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Jack gets a haircut between the dress rehearsal and the show; none of the barbers want to do it because his tips are so small. Don and Oscar the seal do the State Farm commercial. Gisele sings 'Smile'. Jack asks her for a date, but she is busy giving a party to which she has not invited Jack. They do their violin duet, during which Jack's ten dollar suit from Hong Kong comes to pieces.
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A heavy holds up a cafeteria where Jack is eating. Heavy: Dan Duryea. Announcer: Don Wilson.
Jack takes his girlfriend Mildred to a violin concert, even though she would prefer to go to the fights. Jack spots the Stewarts in the audience and tries to get their attention by tossing peanuts at them, eventually driving them out. When Mildred turns on her transistor radio to listen to the fight, the entire audience leaves.
Jack goes Christmas shopping with Rochester and drives the staff of the department store crazy.
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Jack has written his life story for television, and has his agent hire a child actor who is just as cheap as he is to play himself. Remake of the sketch originally done on November 20, 1954.
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Jack honors Don Wilson on the occasion of his 27th year working with Jack. The sketch relates how Don and Jack met: Jack's radio sponsor, the Universal Corset Co., holds auditions for an announcer for Jack's program, and Don is the only one who laughs at Jack's bad jokes. John Daly presents Don with a plaque; Jack disagrees with Daly's statement that Don came to his show when it was "down," and ends by breaking the plaque over Don's head. The Sportsmen sing "Down Yonder"
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Jack goes to a gym so that he can improve his physique and impress a young lady; Don goes with him.
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Jack tells how he developed his thrifty habits as a child in Waukegan, Ill. Eddie Anderson.
Rochester imagines that a crazy doctor is operating on him. Rochester: Eddie Anderson. Don Wilson is the announcer.
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'George Burns' crashes Jack's variety show, which features two songs sung by Ann-Margret and juggler extraordinaire, Francis Brunn.
Rochester gives away Jack's old clothes, not knowing that money is hidden in a lining. Rochester: Eddie Anderson. Watson: Grandon Rhodes. Don Wilson is the announcer for the program.
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