While the Cabinet celebrates Michael Heseltine's resignation, Prince Philip wastes his time trying to teach his son how to play Colditz.

Prince Andrew's in trouble wih his Pa for the size of his unmentionables.

Sir David Attenborough has a philosophical discussion with a suicidal seal.

Desmond Wilcox's new intrusive, fly-on-the-wall documentary comes to grief when the happy couple refuse to watch 'That's Life!'.

Arthur Daley has to bow out of Thatcher's service because he's just not sleazy enough. Jim Callaghan shows the best way to grow your money, while the Shadow Cabinet break into Number 10 and the Queen Mother buys a new titfer (hat).

Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson (Fergie), try to sort out their wedding plans, while a brand new song about holding chickens aloft gets it's first airing.

Ian Paisley indulges in a bit of shouting while Larry gives Johnny advice on ducks.

President Botha gives his country The Facts as he sees them, while some unsuspecting Mormons pay a visit to Cliff Richard's house.

Ronald Reagan confides to Nancy his idea for finishing off Gadaffi.

Michael Foot sends the rest of the Shadow Cabinet to sleepybobos.

The latest edition of 'Potato World' is interrupted with the breaking news that no nuclear accidents have happened at Chernobyl.

David Coleman introduces the Euro Winkle Championships while Cliff frowns on Mrs. Whitehouse's non-virginal status.

Brucie has isues with Tarby's new material when he discovers that it's just a potato.

Edwina Currie vents her spleen on the state of the National Health Service.

Prince Philip grumbles that not only are his quotes being taken out of context, but that he's also expected to eat dog sick.

While Sir Alastair fawns lyrical, he is taken to task for not using enough superlatives.

Norman Tebbit ensures that the Government gets unbiased news coverage by doing it all himself.